Please avail yourself of a pencil and some paper. Ok. Now that you are ready, please take note of the following:
No, I do not want to purchase any additional programs, insurance, payment protection, fraud protection or plant a tree.
No, I do not want to take a survey regarding the level of service, whether or not I liked my computer or thought it was a good deal, or my overall satisfaction (this may change depending on the number of times you continue to call me!).
Yes, I am very happy with my computer. No, I am not experiencing any technical issues. If I do, I will give YOU a call and explain to you the problem and I am sure you will fix it since I bought the warranty. Which brings me to another point: No, I do not want the extended warranty and I do not want a “buy back” warranty. I do have a brain and if I am ever of need of any of the above services, I will call YOU. If you continue to call me and harrass me while I am trying to cook dinner, or doing my homework, I will think very hard next time before purchasing another computer from you. If I would have known that this laptop would come with an average of 2 calls per day from your sales department, I probably would have just ran down to Office Depot and purchased a computer there. Please do not insult my intelligence by couching your attempts to upsale me something into concern over the performance or my overall satisfaction of this machine. Puh-lease! I would assume that the average person purchasing a computer could figure out how to call your 800 number and avail themselves of your warranty services. Your thinly veiled attempts at selling me something is seriously wearing on my nerves.
Thank you and have a nice day!